Silas Dark

A friend of mine once said, "You don't choose the mask. The mask chooses you."

Other than the fact that it seemed a bit over-dramatic, I didn't really get what he meant at the time.

Now though, two years after hanging up my cape, I think I finally understand it.

I've tried to put the superhero life behind me; I really have. After some of the things that happened... some of the things that I discovered... I just didn't have the heart for it any more. I packed my costumes away, and made my best effort to live a 'normal' life... whatever that actually means.

The problem is I couldn't do it. Not really.

Rikti invasions. Ouroborus. It seems as though there is constantly something trying to draw me back in.

In the end, I simply can't sit by and do nothing.

I don't know how much of a difference I can make, but I have to at least try.

My buddy Blurg volunteered to play Santa for a children's shelter last week. He even went to Icon and had a Santa suit custom made for the occasion, complete with a fake beard.

On the way there, however, his Santa hat was blown away during a particularly energetic Super Leap, and he wasn't able to find it. He went on the the shelter and handed out gifts, and then afterwards had this photo taken to send out as a Christmas card:



A few of the children were a little frightened at the sight of a big blue Santa with an eye-patch, but Blurg (bless him) is convinced that it was just because he didn't have a proper Santa hat.

Blurg is a heck of a nice guy, but let's just say the clue bus doesn't always stop at his station. :)

I have been fighting the Circle of Thorns for about as long as I've been wearing this costume, and I've never entirely understood what drives them.

A lust for power? Maybe. That seems to play at least a part in the motivation for most villains, but the Circle of Thorns seem different somehow -- more determined. It's as if they have some other powerful agenda that no one else knows about.

Well, now I know.

Little by little, the pieces fell into place, until I finally realised who -- and what -- I've been fighting all this time... and it scares the hell out of me.

The Truth is unsettling, and I must admit there's a part of me that almost wishes that I could go back to the peaceful ignorance I used to feel, back when I could sleep through the night without waking up in a cold sweat.

There's no going back though.

There's nothing to do but get up each day, put on my mask and cape, and keep doing what I've been doing all along...

I just hope in the end it still means something.

On two different occasions now, I have rescued a Crey Lab, only to be attacked by Crey Security Forces as soon as I left the building.

In both instances, Countess Crey issued an immediate apology and assured me that it was all a mistake, but given some of the activities of supposed "rogue" Crey Agents that I've personally witnessed, I can't help but wonder if perhaps something else is going on.

Was there something in those labs that they didn't want me to see?

I don't know... but I definitely plan to keep my eyes open.

Last week, I got a call from one of my Contacts saying that they might have a possible cure for my condition.

One of the doctors from G.I.F.T.E.D. had determined that it might be possible to use magically-enhanced radiation to artificially force my cells to begin mutating, which might cause them to re-sync with the rest of the Universe.

I don't begin to understand it, but my Contact assured me that this doctor had convinced experts from all the departments that there was a good chance that this would work.

In order to perform the procedure, however, they would need some very precise and unique readings from the core of the Terra Volta reactor.

The engineers at D.A.T.A. constructed a special scanning device, which was then enchanted by mystics from M.A.G.I., and passed along to me. It would be my responsibility to get inside the reactor and take the required readings.

I had to have eight hours of intensive training from E.L.I.T.E. just to grasp all of the very complicated settings and incantations that would be required.

Then I just had to wait, while my Contact haggled with Terra Volta security, trying to get me the security clearance I would need.

Finally, I got the word, and made my way to Terra Volta.

Before I even got past the first check-point, however, I received word that the facility was locked down. Sky Raiders had attacked and were threatening to destroy the reactor!

I was ready to charge in, but the security people assured me that there were simply too many Sky Raiders, and too little time.

It was clear that I would need help.

I sent out the call for assistance, and it was almost immediately answered. In short order, we had a small, but efficient, Team and we went in to take back the reactor.

It was a fierce battle, but in the end, we defeated the Sky Raiders and saved the reactor. So, with scanner in hand, I went into the core and took my readings.

I thanked my new friends, returned the scanner to my Contact, and waited to hear the results.

Finally, what seemed like an eternity later, they were ready for me.

The small room seemed to be filled with doctors, engineers, and mystics, as well as several scientists from S.E.R.A.P.H., and they were all there for just one purpose: to help me.

It was pretty awe-inspiring.

One of the doctors warned me, before we began, that there was chance that this wouldn't work, that nothing would happen. There was also chance that it could worsen my condition, or have unknown side-effects. And, if it did work, there was a very real possibility that I would lose all of my powers as well.

I decided to take the risk, and they began the procedure.

It hurt. It hurt a lot.

I think I lost consciousness a few times, and at one point I thought I was back on that space station, back where it all started.

When they were done, I looked down and for the first time in years, I couldn't see through my own hand. I reached out and grabbed a table, and I could feel the cold metal. I could pick things up, without intense concentration.

I was back in phase with the rest of the world!

For several days, my powers seemed to come and go, sometimes activating on their own and sometimes failing to work at all. There have been some strange side-effects, and a few of my abilities seem to work a bit differently than they used to, but for the most part, I appear to have retained my powers, even though I have very definitely been cured.

Experts from every discipline came together to help me, and I don't know how I'll ever be able to repay that.

Not to mention, the fine Team of heroes that saved the Terra Volta reactor, and made the whole thing possible:

Nico Chicago
ICE BERG
Conduit
Capt Diversity

The only thing I know to do, is to simply continue doing what I have been, using whatever resources I have to serve and protect the citizens of Paragon City.

I hope it's enough.

If there's one thing that the criminal element of Paragon City can all agree on, it's that no matter how much they despise and distrust each other, they hate the city's heroes even more.

It never fails that if I find a group of villains beating down a rival, and I intervene, I will be rewarded by having them gang up to attack me.

Sometimes they will even tend to the wounds of the very ones who were assaulting them earlier, just to help keep them in the fight against me. This is how much they hate us... how much they hate me.

Give them a few minutes though, and they'll be right back at each others throats.

Sometimes I wonder why I even bother.

Then I'll rescue someone from a 5th Column "recruitment" facility or a Circle of Thorns ritual, and I remember.

I do it because it needs to be done.

I think I may have seriously underestimated The 5th Column.

I was making a routine patrol through Independence Port, when I encountered a group of 5th Column soldiers harassing a local citizen. I decided to jump in and show these thugs that this sort of thing won't be tolerated in Paragon City.

Sizing up the situation, I went after the leader first. He was one of the Oberst. I'm not sure exactly what the rank signifies, but I know that they're pretty tough.

They were giving me a run for my money, but I was sure that once I took their boss down, I'd have no problem mopping up the rest.

My arrogance, and ignorance, almost cost me my life.

As soon as he fell, I knew instinctively that something was wrong. There was a strange glow around his unconscious form, and a sharp smell of ozone in the air. Before I could turn my attention to the soldiers, there was a thunderous clap and I found myself facing some kind of giant werewolf.

It was almost twice as tall as me, and rabidly vicious. As it tore into me, the soldiers renewed their own efforts, and I suddenly found myself in a battle that I might actually lose.

Eventually, thanks to luck or skill or perhaps some of both, I managed to take out the Warwolf (as I heard some of the soldiers call it), but I was in hardly any shape to take on the remaining soldiers.

Tapping the last of my reserves, I reached into the darkness and summoned enough power to heal some of my wounds. It wasn't much, but it was enough to let me deal with the soldiers that were left.

Limping back to the Tram Station, I was forced to consider the fact that there may be more to The 5th Column than I had believed. Whatever that Warwolf was, there was definitely magic involved.

I don't know what it could mean in the long run, but I definitely think I'm going to have to keep an eye on The 5th Column from now on.

I just received word that a scientist from S.E.R.A.P.H. has discovered something that might be related to my condition.

Apparently he found that it's possible to cause a material to become radioactive, using magical rather than scientific means. One of my contacts at M.A.G.I. has spoken with him, and they believe that this may be what happened to me.

If it is, then there is a chance that it might be possible to reverse, or at least greatly reduce, the effects.

They are currently trying to get me the proper security clearances to talk to someone at the Terra Volta Reactor, since that's the only facility that would be capable of producing the levels of radiation that would be required in order to cure me.

For now, all I can do is wait.

Yesterday I received a tip that the Tsoo were causing trouble for some local businesses, so I decided to check it out.

I captured the Tsoo gang leaders and disarmed the bombs they'd planted, but apparently the businesses were actually fronts for a crime syndicate called The Family, and one of the office workers that I rescued agreed to testify against them.

The Family has decided to blame me for this, and so now I have yet another group gunning for me in Paragon City.

I wasn't looking for a war, but if they want one, I'm more than willing to give it to them.

I seem to be upsetting a lot of people these days.

More and more frequently, I will find myself being ambushed while walking down the street. I expected to have The Circle of Thorns after me, since I've been interrupting many of their rituals, but apparently I've also come to the attention of a group calling themselves The Tsoo. In some ways, they seem almost like a street gang, like the Outcasts or the Warriors, but they definitely have a strong mystical connection, and perhaps that's why they've taken an interest in my activities.

I've started wearing civilian clothes more often, which seems to help somewhat, but my enemies still manage to track me down eventually, if they're determined enough.

I seem to be doing a lot more missions these days that have nothing to do with magic. While it's a little disheartening (I am, after all, anxious to continue my investigations into my own problem), I hardly think it would be appropriate to pick and choose. The 5th Column and Freakshow pose just as much threat to the citizens of Paragon City as The Circle of Thorns or Banished Pantheon.

I am supposed to be a hero, after all... whatever that means.

As the days go by, I seem to be making more and more enemies, and yet I find myself no closer to my goal that when I started.

I try not to get discouraged, but so far it seems that the secrets of The Disciples of Eth died with them three years ago, along with my hopes for a cure.

The Circle of Thorns seemed promising for a while. Even though their objectives are clearly different, they seem to employ some methods and dark magicks similar to those the Disciples used. I was particularly optimistic when I discovered their temple and found that they were attempting to open portals to some other realm. Surely this could relate to what happened to me!

Sadly, even thought I managed to shut down their operation, I was able to gain no information of any use to me. Apparently the Circle's magic lacks the technological aspect of the Magical Devices that were favoured by the Disciples. Somehow, in spite of other similarities, that difference seems to be a vital one with respect to my problem.

I have to say though, the big brains at M.A.G.I. and D.A.T.A. have really been putting their heads together trying to come up with something to help me, and I do appreciate it. It just seems that I'm spending a great deal of time working with them to solve their problems and yet so little progress seems to be being made on mine.

I don't mean to sound bitter. I honestly feel like I'm doing some good here, and that's definitely worthwhile. I'm just impatient I guess.

For now, all I can do is wait, and try to do whatever I can to make some small difference in Paragon City.

I have decided to keep a journal of my experiences, as I try to come to terms with my accident, the circumstances surrounding it, and my ongoing search for a cure for my condition.

Until recently, I have simply lamented the fact that I can no longer lead a normal life, instead of considering all of the possibilities that my strange abilities might present for me.

To that end, I have chosen to use whatever resources I have available to not only find a way to reclaim my life, but also to overcome the very forces of evil that have trapped me in this cursed state.

I have decided to finally step out of the shadows, as it were.